Figures on the wall and other important stuff

The lady has been gone for a bit now - in Steamboat interning at a park - and that's cool. However, with her gone, it seems I am out of control.
Today I went shopping. I hate shopping, but I went. What did I come home with? A Darth Maul and some ewoks. Yep, two new figures for the wall.
Also lost some money on poker. Turns out epassporte won't let me use some offshore account to load money up. What a rip off. Only 3 weeks to Vegas though. I can feel the wallet empty now.

I stabbed myself...

As it turns out, it is never a wise decision to place an odd looking thumbtack in your back pocket. I assume it is inevitable you will be poked - or stabbed in this case - by the thumb tack. I ask myself, "Was it worth getting stabbed in the rear to hang up that autographed hockey jersey?" You bet your sweet ass it was.
Also, subscription based video games on journalist's salaries are ridiculous. So many games, so few monies. Stupid commercialism.
Plus, I hate the gym, but am thankful for steak.

Also, this is where you can subscribe, and you should because I'm trying to beat Scott T.

Finally, somebody put some pants on this guy

Holy majoly! I've finally seen it. After years of controversy, someone has finally put pants on the Kool-Aid guy.
I never thought it'd happen, but it did.
R.I.P. naked Kool-Aid man, R.I.P.

I guess it's not Kool to go pants-less these days, guess I'll have to go put some on.

Check it out here

Hey, lay off my candy!

I don't like the sun. You see, whenever I have a bag, or box, or Reese's Pieces in my car, the sun goes ahead and melts it. It's like the sun is saying, "Hey, you. You little fat kid, quit eating candy."

Damn you, sun. Damn you.

I like candy, but I don't like having to lick candy off the seats of my car. Or the floor of it, because you never know what else you are licking. Just last night I thought I was licking candy off the floor but then it turned out to be tequila. Who knew I had tequila on the floor?

Interesting...

The exclamation point

It never fails. Every week someone writes an article which I have the wonderful opporunity of editing, and every week, somebody uses a keyboard that has only the exclamation point key on it. No periods, no commas, not even a question mark. Pure exclamation.
By the end of reading it I have a headache because I feel like the writer is yelling at me!
See, I used one there so you would get the feeling! Look, I used another one! See what i'm talking about, all of these damn exclamation points!!
Quit using them, pronto.
Damn you English language and your numerous types of punctuation. There's a time and place for exclamation points, and as it turns out, it's not at the end of every sentence.