Hey, lay off my candy!

I don't like the sun. You see, whenever I have a bag, or box, or Reese's Pieces in my car, the sun goes ahead and melts it. It's like the sun is saying, "Hey, you. You little fat kid, quit eating candy."

Damn you, sun. Damn you.

I like candy, but I don't like having to lick candy off the seats of my car. Or the floor of it, because you never know what else you are licking. Just last night I thought I was licking candy off the floor but then it turned out to be tequila. Who knew I had tequila on the floor?

Interesting...